sarahvstheworld

Steve Burns.

2009-12-22T20:15:19Z

Fallen in love with his music! I like it a lot!! :D
go listen.
and watch this!

I LOVE THIS SHOW!

She calls them nightmares

2009-09-22T21:41:12Z

Acid keeps raining
on her little house
she tried everything
to get rid of it
but it becomes part of her.

Each moment burns more and more
sinking into her skin
getting directed to the heart.

She lays in a dark room,
with the boom-box playing.
It's like the radio knew
with each word being said.

She opens the door
takes four steps in
and looks.

In a room that seats a million
there sits one.

With all others open,
she chooses the one next to him.
It seemed to be the warmest.

Nightmares are controlling her nights
and day dreams take over her day

She cant take two steps
without falling to het knees
in remorse of all she has lost,
She has lost a piece of herself.

She always said, "I'll wait for you."
She always said, "I'll wait until I'm 53!"
She hoped he would remember, "Stop looking for love because it is sitting right in front of you"

__________________________________________________________________________________

Putting her pain behind her
she emotionally hides in the corners
listening and looking for what ever is to come next

People ask her too many questions
asking why she could stand to be with the one who holds the pain in his hands.
She tells them the same thing over and over.
It’s not really happening and its all just a ~~dream~~ nightmare.
That it would all be gone when she woke up.

Her arm stretches outward

because she is loosing the grasp of her sanity.

It's hard for her to talk to others because they couldn’t careless.

So she says nothing.
And puts a smile on.

She chews on razor blades
and walk straight into the ocean
hoping no one will stop her
because all of that feels a lot better than this now
she writes stories
quite like this one
because it is the only way to get it out

Goosebumps and cold chills run up and down her spine.
And she lets get butterflies take over.
Controlling the way she moves, feels and acts.
They won’t let her go.
SHE WON’T LET GO!

_____________________________________________________________________________________________________

I Enjoy writing quite a bit! even if i am bad!!!

writing.

2009-09-18T01:33:30Z

i really need to write! like intensely! I'm gonna be like turning my house upside down to look for a notebook later.. my life just decides to get hectic all of the sudden. (not fun) but I've cried enough.. no mores of that i hope. but.... i feel so much better if i write about it. idk. its like getting my feelings without telling anyone... cause i know my friends dont want to hear about it!! all i have is my writing.. perfect song just came on...
"WHY DOES LOVE ALWAYS FEEL LIKE A BATTLE FIELD!??!?!?!"
the end.

ohh my life.

2009-04-14T00:50:42Z

I have absolutely no life, so I am on here a lot!
I am a christian.
I am saving myself for marriage.
I am a "free agent" :D lol
I have texting, so text anytime you want.
Just ask for my number.
No one ever talks to me on here.
I love being loud and obnoxious.
You shouldn't ever expect anything from me, I'm very unpredictable!
I am a super big dork.
In the mornings for school I get ready in 10 minutes.
People think I am witty.
I don't like PDA.
I don't get the perfect grades.
I'll talk to anyone.
I enjoy calling people "hun" "darling" "babe", names like that, so don't think I have feelings for you if I say them.:p
I love making people laugh.
I'm in the marching band.
I play Clarinet.
If you annoy me I will tell you.
I judge people way too fast, so sorry if I hurt you.
My hand writing is very messy.
My favorite drink is a grape Jones soda.
I don't know what I want to be when I grow up.
I like a lot of music.
I hate country music.
I wish at 11:11.
I have self esteem issues.
My Jones soda cap just said i saved a kids life. :D
I type these faces :D, :p, :'( a lot.
I say "lol" "omg" and "wtf" out loud way too often.
I fall for people was too fast, so don't tempt me.
I enjoy people sending me cheesy pick-up lines.
i make a lot of stupid faces that make my friends laugh uncontrollably.
I'm tall and sorta skinny.
I've gained weight.
I'm one of those people where if you don't text me back I get super offended.
I still watch the Disney channel.
I still watch Nick.
I think it is easier to talk to boys rather than girls.
I have the bestest friends in America!

Olivia-"http://i267.photobucket.com/albums/ii305/SarahBethAdkins/m_4092961eef4041bfb62fad37029a87f6.jpg" border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>

Lacie-"http://i267.photobucket.com/albums/ii305/SarahBethAdkins/m_4a739a36fdea4a3ba3d2ccedb06cad03.jpg" border="0" alt="Lacie"></a>

Haley-"http://i267.photobucket.com/albums/ii305/SarahBethAdkin/m_472bfccb9f7c48a7962852c9457dee27.jpg" border="0" alt="HayFerg"></a>

Johnny-"http://i267.photobucket.com/albums/ii305/SarahBethAdkins/m_5f4faf0e70f5424c987f99cf3c56bf5d.jpg" border="0" alt="Johnny"></a>

Luke-"http://i267.photobucket.com/albums/ii305/SarahBethAdkins/m_2eb13db22f4a4b94a9626be09a047f20.jpg" border="0" alt="Luke"></a>

Ryan-"http://i267.photobucket.com/albums/ii305/SarahBethAdkins/m_49e3a133c74cd54d6a668a5f7ede790e.jpg" border="0" alt="Ryan"></a>

Woot

2008-12-19T14:45:35Z

Last day of school 'til '09!
yay

I am uber excited about doing NOTHING all day.
1st- Slide show
2nd-the normal stuff
3rd-retarded movie
4th-PARTY
6th-well it's just band.

yay.
my christmas break will be amazing!

Olivia and I have been growing our leg hair out so we can wax it before Winter X-treme (which we really need to do.)
Winter X-treme wont be as fun this year (Lacie isnt gonne be there) :( sad!

gah im gonna go back to class now.
Love,
Sarah

dfjmdgjsdfj

2008-09-11T16:07:45Z

SCHOOL SUCKS!!!!!!!!!!!!

i hates it!
;P

sarahvstheworld @ 2008-08-19T18:32:00

2008-08-19T23:46:43Z

From the first moment I talked to you
I know I liked you
it has been four years since that moment
and my feelings haven't changed,
they merely grew

I see you at your locker
and in a couple of my classes
I want to tell you how I feel
but my shyness keeps taking over

A life without you in it
gets me cringing at the thought
because you are my knight in shining armor
and I will always need you.

I can talk to you for hours on end
about stupid things like dinosaur paintings
but I still cant tell you how much you need to me

You make me feel like a little kid again
cause every time I see you it is exactly the same
you give me the butterflies
and a smile that wont seem to go away
but when you smile back
you let me know everything will be okay

do this if ya like.

2008-06-12T22:27:38Z

1. Name:
2. Birthday:
3. Place of residence:
4. What makes you happy:
5. What are you listening to now/have listened to last:
6. Do you read my LJ:
7. If you do, what is particularly good/bad about it:
8. An interesting fact about you:
9. Are you in love/have a crush at the moment:
10. Favorite place to be:
11. Favorite lyric:
12. Best time of the year:

13: Post the most recent picture of yourself:

RECOMMEND
1. A film:
2. A book:
3. A band, a song and an album:

PLUS
1. One thing you like about me:
2. Two things you like about yourself:
3. Put this in your LJ so i can tell you what I think of you

RAWWWR

2008-05-23T16:36:48Z

School is so... blah..

I'm excited that it's over, but I'm also pretty sad that my freinds are leaving.

In first period today we watched the baby video... mehh..

Second, we took our final.

Third, Watched Fever Pitch

Forth, I'm gonna be over at the middle school most of the time a'cause the band is playing freakin POMP AND CIRCUMSTANCE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

fkjhfsjhgd

i want to go home.
i really dont want to be here now.
lalalalalalalalala not watching fever pitch.

myspace is stupid.
i give up!!

well i guess I'll go now..
this is boring me!!!

c'ya
<3 Sars.

odd.

2008-05-23T15:26:46Z

That dream keeps playing back in my head. No more three hour naps right after school while watching Mighty Morphin Power Rangers. :)

We were in Florida and I was lying on my beach towel in the warm golden sand. He was hovering over me applying sunscreen to my back to make sure I didn’t get burned like I had the time before. Except this time it was night. I turned over to where I was laying on my back. I looked up and there it was, his bright, big, blue, eyes looking back into mine. He gives me that grin, you know, the one that says "You look really pretty today, I love you." his face got close to mine. Our noses were touching, and then he tries to kiss me. I turned away. He looks at me with this confused look and says, "That didn’t go like I expected." I looked up at him, giggled, and with smiles on our faces, we kissed. We actually kissed. Nothing could make this moment better. I couldn’t help but to smile. Oddly enough there was one thing that could make this sweet moment, turn into a hilarious one. Ms. Cook walked up with perfect timing. While he was still laying on me she looked at him and said "What would Jesus do?" His scratchy stubble was on my face as he put his head down while he silently laughed. We knew what she meant by that but were too embarrassed to say anything about it.

I woke up.

And there, in this cold sweat I laid there still, not moving because I wanted to go back to sleep, I needed to keep dreaming.
I finally fell back asleep, but I didn’t keep that dream, no, instead it was about a freakin’ haunted house.

mehh.
:)

Flipped

2008-05-21T15:32:22Z

My heart stopped. It just stopped beating. And for the first time in my life, I had the feeling. You know, like the world is moving all around you, all beneath you all inside you and you're floating, floating in mid-air and the only thing keeping you from drifting away is their eyes. They're connected to yours by some invisible physical force, and they hold you fast while the rest of the world swirls and twirls and falls completely away.

ahh.

thoughts 4/24/08

2008-04-27T01:24:27Z

What have I got myself into?

There are things that I said I would never do,

But I did them anyway.

Now if I want to turn back

I can’t

I would hurt everyone else around me.

I can’t move forward,

Without hurting myself.

I’m stuck,

You still leave me speechless,

I can tell you anything,

Even my deepest darkest secret,

And but we’re never alone.

I’m disappointed in myself,

‘Cause I made a stupid decision

Tears,

And more tears

I don’t know what to do,

I gotta get through this day,

I have to talk to you.

I always do this.

People get in my head,

And make me forget all the thoughts that I had before

This happened once before,

And I hurt plenty of people in the process.

I don’t know if I can go through it again.

Today I will come up to you,

We will actually talk,

I need to!

I need you!

I missed you today.

I was stuck with the past,

And you weren’t there to help me out of it.

Tomorrow we are walking,

And talking.

So I can figure out what to do.

I can’t get through it on my own.

I need guidance!

Your guidance, my knight, is the best there is!

I look up to you.

I look to you for guidance.

I thought about calling you the other day,

And asking you to come over

So we can talk.

Just us.

No one else!

Alone.

I lost my dearest friends,

Apparently they don’t want me to be happy.

I get a guy and they get mad.

I talk about a guy and they get mad.

I just need to talk it all out.

Just so I can understand!

And you can understand with me.

I can’t sleep,

I can’t eat!

All I do is think.

Ethan keeps asking me what I’m thinking about.

But I can’t tell him anything.

Matt is the only person I could ever go to.

No one else knows.

I thought I could possibly go to Mark with this but,

I don’t really trust him.

I don’t really talk to Elijah anymore... I wish I could.

Olivia is bitchy. I try to stay away from her.

Brooke hates me.

I can’t really talk to Lacie, I don’t know why, I just can’t.

Matt’s all I have anymore!

And I’m fine with that.

The only problem is he’s never around,

Or he is with Lauren.

I just need him,

Alone,

Then we can talk.

I told him at break that I needed to talk to him,

He seemed fine with that.

But it must be soon.

I don’t really know if I can handle it taking more than three days to talk to him

I need him now preferably.

Things like this can’t wait.

I’m actually tired of Ethan being all over me all the time.

I can handle holding hands, him scratching my back.

But that’s it.

No kissing.

No lying in the grass together (though it was fun when Matt came over)

I honestly think that we should just stay friends. I mean for now at least.

At least until I get things settled.

There will still be feelings there, no doubt.

But I can’t handle it now.

As soon as I am ready to tell him that I can’t do it anymore,

He says these things that hook me back again.

And I just can’t handle these feelings bottled up anymore.

I need to let it out.

I’m sorry Matt,

But you are going to be hearing this all soon.

Tomorrow is picnic day,

And you aren’t gonna be there.

I can’t handle this anymore.

It has gone too far.

And at the same time

Not far at all.

name game

2008-03-26T00:07:08Z

SARAH BETH ADKINS    15
EMILY BROOKE ADKINS                                        17
LACIE ELIZABETH SWIHART                                21
JOHNATHON LUKE CORELY                               19

Robert Matthew Trodglen                                       21
Ethan Asher McCoy                                                 15
Mark Aaron norris                                                    15
Johnny winston dawson                                        19
olivia jade mingus                                                   16
morgan peyton young                                             17
Steven Dwayne Renfrow                                        19
Bethany Nicole Mingus                                           19
Preston Wayne Ball                                                 16
Robert Wayne Cathers                                           18

March 13, 2008 Band Bus

2008-03-25T23:58:52Z

Band bus... BORED!!!!!

I have nothing to do..eh.
today didnt go as i expected...but guess it was fine i was expecting something special but anyway.

i wanna sleep! i havent slept much lately. this whole sam thing has messed me all up.
FOOD TIME!!!!(New China Buffet)

then sleep. i needs is!

March 13, 2008 life skills

2008-03-25T23:50:20Z

THE MAGICAL AMOUNT! ack stuck in my head! ehh
I havent talked to Matt all day. prolly wont get to.:(
sad.
wel i got an ethan hug today so 'm pretty conent
AHH!
CONFUSED!!!!
I want to figure things out but i cant.
I <3 EEEFAN
Olivia claims that Sam (wardrip) cares about me. and she knows that i like Sam (Abbott). liv started naming the stuf the he does, like smoking weed for example. i guess i believe her but i dont want to. he is just another Mark. telling me what i want to hear and when it comes down to it he never really liked me in the first place. oh my gosh what am i gonig to myself? setting myself up for another heart break? there are so many other great guys out there for me and one happens to be one of my best friends but im too afraid to make a move because im afraid of rejection. he is such an amazing boy.

Awaken from the life you live
and reality is what you will find
take the moment and savor them
for they will be gone soon.

For what ever comes out
know that you still have me
even in the times of hate
i will still love you

over and over again
we refer back to our old times
when all we realy need to do
is look at the now

all of our lives
we worked up to these moments
to know that we have someone when we fall
still leaves me breathless

insane it is
to think i almost lost you
and until death due us part
we will have each other

March 12, 2008 school

2008-03-25T22:59:16Z

Is it such a sin that teens can’t have fun anymore?

You are taking it all away from us when we did nothing.

You claim we "run people off" by being so "immature",

But is it true?

NO.

I have changed so many times before,

Hoping that is wouldn’t need to do it again.

I finally figured out who I am.

So I’m not changing again for you.

As much as it hurts me to say,

It must be said.

Maybe this whole thing was a mistake.

At one point in time we were friends.

What happened to that?

You have watched me grow up a lot these past few years and automatically you want me to become a successful adult?

Our ages range from fourteen to sixteen,

None quite ready for adulthood wouldn’t you say?

We all have time.

So give it to us.

I looked up to you more and more each day,

Until now.

That all became lost when these things were said.

IT HURT!

Many tears were shed!

Do you care?

You hurt us all,

Deep.

She told me about what you said.

And I immediately thought, "Is the world coming to an end?"

Never in a million years would I have thought this would happen.

It left us all speechless.

Your words broke my heart.

So much that I can’t even think straight.

All we ever tried doing was apologizing.

I don’t understand this.

I don’t understand you.

Why have you don’t this to us?

It makes no sense.

What was the point to all of this?

To hurt your friends?

We all have lost something very important to us,

And it was you.

Whatever is going in is going on in your head I am not quite sure of.

But I must say I am dearly sorry.

You have been there through ALL my problems,

Helping me.

Making things right.

And now you are saying that is has to change?

Changes have to be made but I’m not sure if it was the ones that you were thinking about.

If only there was that one word that could save us all again.

We, even you, just need to open our eyes and look at the big picture.

Things have mostly changed for the better.

Not everyone is perfect.

Why does everyone expect that from us?

Love needs to be shared. It’s how we get out of here.

Fact:

Back when preps ruled the classrooms, lunch tables, community, even church nobody was truly happy were they? People were trying to fit in with everybody else. People lived to be popular and feel wanted. Church was torture. The preps took over. No one could control it. It wasn’t fun being in the youth group, going different places with them was hard. You felt like crap knowing that they would never want to be seen with you guys.

But I realized something. It doesn’t matter how cool you are. You just need to be wanted. Immature or not immature it doesn’t matter just as long as you are having fun. Me and my friends are immature, I must admit. But the thing is, we just want to have fun. And we found a way to do that.

BE YOURSELF! Don’t pretend you are something else to impress the people around you.

You certainly cannot change every time someone sees a flaw. We all have our views on how someone should be, someone should act, but only you have the say on what should be done about yourself.

Fact:

The reason that we "don’t keep a guy" may very well be that we don’t want one at the time. It takes time to realize what we want exactly want in a guy. We pick and choose from the worst selection imaginable. Boys around here aren’t what we exactly want. For example I like my best friend. He is wonderful. But right now I am too afraid to make a move because I am afraid that he could end up like the rest of them.

At this age people might say that you need a "partner" to make you happy, but I say that you don’t. I am perfectly content with my life right now. I’m out having fun, being a teen. A boyfriend right now for me would be chaos. I have a nice balance of School, Church, friends and I’m ohk with that!

Febuary 27, 2008 computer tech

2008-03-25T22:18:16Z

Mistakes have been made and i cant take them back
i would if i could but i cant
these mistakes have caused everybody trouble
i guess i should take my own advice and find myself in a self awakening
i need help i know i do
but some how i don't get around to doing that
i wont give up
so got gibe up on me
support

Febuary 25, 2008 computer tech

2008-03-25T22:14:15Z

You can't just go by in life hoping that someone will be there when you fall.

You must learn for yourself now, instead of learning from everyone else's experiences.

Time after time people go about their lives the wrong way.

You soar past hoping that nothing bad will ever come and when it does you can't do anything about it.

Relying on your friends to help you though these times is ok to a point, but sometimes you must take it all on your own because someday you will be all alone with no one to go to.

Not one person has ALL the answers in life.

Try to figure them out on your own.

Do you think you have something to prove?

Your insecurities are showing.

You try your hardest to make everyone think that you are actually something special, when all you really are is a normal person.

Unique,

but still a person.

You don't have to go now.

I still need you!

But change is what is needed at the moment.

I've wasted too many dreams on you.

It's too late I'm sure.

Nobody is perfect.

There is no way possible that any one person could be.

You aren't fooling anybody.

You're putting on a show and the audience is already tired of it.

Everybody has problems.

It's not just you.

Self-awakening.

Thunderstorms have already started and cannot be stopped just by you.

I don't know what to do with you anymore.

Words don't seem to help.

You aren't listening to anyone.

Is this for real?

You're taking love for granted.

It is IMPOSSIBLE to "love" more than one person like you do.

It takes time to realize that.

Patience,

I will at least give you that.

Your thoughts push me up against the wall.

You know nothing in this story,

And you think you do.

A part of me is saying "let go."

And the other, bigger part can't even control the thoughts of not having you.

I'm sorry but I've waited too long.

It's not worth any more tears.

I've waited too long to say this.

Take these words to heart if you can understand them.

It's not just some silly text.

Where will I find you're gone?

I love you, I really do.

Febuary 6, 2008 5:32pm

2008-03-25T22:11:16Z

Church, bored, wishing Sam would call.
but no he never does.
today he messaged me saying that he is starting to like me more and more ask the days pass. YAY!
I'm guessing that the other day or even today Mark told Liv about how i still like him ehh...and he promised he wouldn't.
it pissed me off so bad.
sometimes he can be the sweetest guy in the who world and then other days he can be so rude... i don't understand him.

Sarah & Sam.

sarahvstheworld @ 2008-03-25T16:58:00

2008-03-25T22:02:41Z

so my live journal is going to consist of my thoughts that i have been having since the beginning of the year.
at first its gonna be my thoughts from my notebook that i have been writing in lately.

here it goes.